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<title>always have the very same properties by oh-how-charming (twofourteen)</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24428371">always have the very same properties</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/twofourteen/pseuds/oh-how-charming'>oh-how-charming (twofourteen)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>the best thing in the world (except for cough drops) [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Teen Wolf (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Alternate Universe - Human, Always Female Stiles Stilinski, Derek Hale Interacts With Children, Female Stiles Stilinski, Hale Family Feels, Tooth-Rotting Fluff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 07:40:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,349</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24428371</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/twofourteen/pseuds/oh-how-charming</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Thanks for bringing him home Parrish. And just remember, Derek might like bubble baths but your lady likes to talk too.” </p><p>Parrish just let out a long laugh, “I am sure she does. We get freaky.”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>the best thing in the world (except for cough drops) [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1738996</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>103</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>always have the very same properties</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Derek cries, Stiles cries, then they both cry. It's a study of emotions. Or an excuse for me to write ridiculous fluff. </p><p>No beta, no plot, just a scene dump.</p><p>Title from - “Tears of joy and tears of sorrow sometimes have very different causes, but always have the very same properties.” - Mokokoma Mokhonoana</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>It happened in what felt like a blink of an eye. One second he was humming along to some random song that Stiles added to his “my bae won’t get bored” playlist on Spotify. The next second there was screeching tires and mangled metal and the breath was pushed out of his lungs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit</span>
  <em>
    <span> shit</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Derek took immediate inventory of his body, all his appendages were still there, nothing was bent at a weird angle, nothing hurt enough that he couldn’t move. He untangled himself from the seatbelt and pushed the driver’s side door open. A couple of people had already pulled to the side of the road and were rushing to help. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sir, </span>
  <em>
    <span>sir</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Are you okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“M’fine.” He looked over at the other car and noticed the deer in the headlights look coming from the driver in the car.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He made his way around to her, “Hey - are you alright?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my </span>
  <em>
    <span>god</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Oh my </span>
  <em>
    <span>god</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Shit. Shit. I am so sorry. Oh my god.” She had a small cut on her forehead, and it looked like a coffee had spilled in the interior of her car. “Oh my </span>
  <em>
    <span>god</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey - don’t - I am okay. It’s just a car. Are you hurt?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t… I don’t think so.” She padded herself down, making a face at the coffee stains on her pants and shirt. “I have insurance! I have it here.” She tossed the now empty coffee cup aside in an attempt to get to her glove compartment. “It’s here, I’ll grab it, and… we can exchange it.” She was starting to panic.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry about that right now. Cops are on their way, they’ll get that all for us.” Derek gave her a small smile, “Just take some deep breaths, okay? We are both okay. No one got hurt too bad. Just a little fender bender.” She nodded at him, looked out the window of her car at the mangled front end of her car and burst into tears.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was a bit of a whirlwind when the police arrived, so it when Parrish was wrapping up the report, Derek realized he should probably call Stiles so she didn’t hear it through some weird game of “did you hear about Derek?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She picked up on the second ring, “B</span>
  <em>
    <span>aaa</span>
  </em>
  <span>be! Did you get lost? Is Gino’s that busy? Bring me pizza!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t freak out.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What happened? Who died? Are you dead? Where’s my dad?” Stiles voice upticked in speed with each question.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Derek was sitting in the passenger side of Parrish’s patrol car, “Baby, I’m fine - just a little car accident.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my </span>
  <em>
    <span>god</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Where are you? Are there broken bones? Did anyone get hurt? I’m putting on pants and picking you up right now.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stiles - baby - take a breath. I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Everyone is okay.” He heard her exhale a deep breath. “Cars got towed already, and Parrish is just wrapping up the report and he’s going to drop me off, okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A quiet, scared voice responded, “You’re sure you’re not hurt?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I promise, I’m not hurt. Probably will just be a little sore for a few days.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Parrish spoke loud enough for Stiles to hear him, “Nothing that a nice hot, bubble bath won’t cur - </span>
  <em>
    <span>ow motherfucker</span>
  </em>
  <span>. I could arrest you for assaulting a police officer.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles let out a small huff of laughter. “Just come home, okay?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>As Parrish’s cruiser turned onto their street, Derek saw Stiles sitting on the front steps. He saw Miko pawing at something on the driveway, probably trying to scare a grasshopper or something. She was at the passenger door before the car completely parked, pulling the door open and gently pulling him out. She leaned down, “Thanks for bringing him home Parrish. And just remember, Derek might like bubble baths but your lady likes to talk too.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Parrish just let out a long laugh, “I am sure she does. We get freaky.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Both Stiles and Derek let out an “</span>
  <em>
    <span>ugggh</span>
  </em>
  <span>” as Derek pushed the car door closed. Parrish put the car in reverse, waved and honked as he backed up and drove away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles looked at Derek, eyes wide. She ran her hands </span>
  <em>
    <span>everywhere</span>
  </em>
  <span>. “You’re sure you’re not hurt? No hairline fractures? Did you hit your head?” She even crouched down and rubbed her hands across his ankles, looking at his toes wiggling in his cheap sandals. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Baby, I am </span>
  <em>
    <span>okay</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Just need some aspirin, a shot of something brown and a nap with my favorite person.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She pulled herself into his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck, “But Parrish already left.” She hiccuped a little, tripping over the last word. Derek poked her in the side, whispering “funny” against her temple as he took several steps forward, Stiles walking backwards with him but not letting go. Derek snapped his fingers a few times as Miko finally realized ‘daaaaaaad’ and was trying to jump up on them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles quickly untangled her arms from around his neck, grabbing his hand and pulling him up the stairs and into the house, whistling for Miko who clomped in after them. Derek kicked off his sandals, never letting go of Stiles as she silently pulled him up the stairs to their bedroom. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stiles…” As they got to the bedroom, she finally turned to look at him, tears falling down her cheeks. “Hey woah. Come here.” He pulled her close as he sat down on the end of the bed, letting her curl around him. “I’m okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just scared someday it’s …” She shuddered around the next breath. “What if someday that call comes in that you got </span>
  <em>
    <span>hurt</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” The emphasis is implied. She pulled herself closer, “You can’t leave me, okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She rubbed her nose against his shirt in what he was sure was now being used as a Derek shaped Kleenex. He rubbed his hands up and down her back, kissed her, “I do everything in my power every day to come back safe, okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Miko flounced into the room with Derek’s sandal in his mouth, flopping down in his bedroom bed (“Stiles. We don’t need to buy him </span>
  <em>
    <span>four</span>
  </em>
  <span> beds.” “Uhh. Bedroom bed. Living room bed. Kitchen bed. Office bed. That’s four.” “He’s a d- he can lay on the carpet like a normal dog.” “Miko isn’t normal, you take that back!”) and looking up at Derek like ‘What’re you gonna do ‘bout it?’ </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Several minutes passed, and Derek could feel Stiles relax moment by moment. Her fingers were tapping against his side, her excess energy always looking for an outlet. She let the slide under the material, tapping against his skin now. She made eye contact with him, applying a bit of pressure with the pads of her fingers, one last sniffle from her tears. “I mean -” She swallowed, “We get to cross off ‘narrowly escaped death sex’ off our bucket list now, right?” She grinned. “Like </span>
  <em>
    <span>right now</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p>
  <b>Stiles</b>
  <span>: DEREK. It’s happening! The baby! Is! Coming! <br/></span>
  <b>Stiles</b>
  <span>: We are at Memorial East - Room 9521. <br/></span>
  <b>Stiles</b>
  <span>: BRING FLOWERS FOR YOU SISTER. AND NUGGETS FOR FREDDY.<br/></span>
  <b>Stiles</b>
  <span>: And nuggets for me too, if we’re being real. &lt;3 &lt;3 &lt;3</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles was sitting in the waiting room, building a pretty rad tower of Legos with Freddy, who was asking a constant line of questions.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When mommy pushes baby brother out, will her belly button be an innie again?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Does baby brother have teeth?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Will baby brother know who I am?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Isaac said that baby brother jumped on Momma’s bladder a lot? Babies can jump? Can baby brother jump as high as me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stiles, will you help me protect baby brother if bad monsters come again?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>This was the eleventh Hale baby that had come into the world since Stiles joined their family; but something felt special about this one. Charli was the baby girl of the Hale family, and she was having, if all the birth control held and no condoms were broken, the last Hale baby. Momma and Papa Hale were on their way in, and most of the siblings planned on visiting in stages with their own broods. Stiles was here, as the Supervisor of Freddy (a title given to her by Charli) and unofficial Protector of Mommy (a title given to her by Freddy).</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is Uncle Dede gonna be here soon?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles stacked another few blocks on top of her tower, “You know what kiddo, he should be. Should we call him and make sure he didn’t forget your chickie nuggets?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t forget my chickie nuggets would he</span>
  </em>
  <span>?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We are calling him </span>
  <em>
    <span>right now</span>
  </em>
  <span> to find out.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles quickly took out her phone, and called Derek. She set the phone in between them, on speaker, thankful that the waiting room was empty except for them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey baby, I am almo-”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uncle </span>
  <em>
    <span>Dede</span>
  </em>
  <span>! Did you forget my </span>
  <em>
    <span>nuggets</span>
  </em>
  <span>?!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Buddy, I would never forget your nuggets! Don’t tell Stiles, but I got her a </span>
  <em>
    <span>salad</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Both Freddy and Stiles made silly gross faces, “Ewww.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m just parking now, I’ll be there in a flash.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>I LOVE YOU UNCLE DEDE</span>
  </em>
  <span>!!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Love you too buddy. I guess you too Stiles.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles blew raspberries at the phone while Freddy fell over laughing, knocking his Lego tower over, “See if I tell you I love you back buttface.” Freddy giggled more. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Uncle Dede is </span>
  <em>
    <span>so funny</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Funny </span>
  <em>
    <span>looking</span>
  </em>
  <span>…” She disconnected the call and giggled a little more with Freddy as they picked up the fallen tower of Legos.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>After Derek delivered (hey-o) their McDonald’s and Freddy was set up with his lunch, he went and checked in on Charli. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey Cha-cha, how’re you feeling?” He brought a fresh pitcher of ice chips with him and stood next to her bed, holding her hand, kissing her temple. “You look good… Stiles said everything is just moving slow?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He’s just taking his sweet little time mamboing on out of there.” She took a deep breath, clenching Derek’s hand, “Owwowwshitowwoww.” She took a few more ragged breaths, swore in a few more languages and then relaxed (as much as she could) back into the bed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is Freddy being good for Stiles? He was getting a little stir crazy in here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, he’s fine. I got them both chicken nuggets for lunch, they’re fine.” Derek and Charli both grinned, thankful that the people they loved could be wrangled in with chicken nuggets.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It took a few more hours, but the cries of the newest Hale family baby filled the hallways. After the rush of getting everyone cleaned up was over, there was the moment of Charli introducing Freddy to his baby brother. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charli looked down at Freddy, who was nuzzled against one side of her and her new baby was nestled in the crook of her other arm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Momma</span>
  </em>
  <span>. It’s my baby brother.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It is sweetness, what do you think of him?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He’s so</span>
  <em>
    <span> much</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Did Doctor Henry make sure to count all his fingers?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He’s got ten.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And toes?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ten too.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Wow</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” He leaned over him and reached out, and gasped a little when baby fingers wrapped around his. “Momma! We’re holdin’ hands!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You are, be careful buddy. Remember, gentle touches.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know momma. I’mma be so careful.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The whirlwind of the day had Freddy zonked out about ten minutes later, tucked in on the fold out chair bed thing. Stiles and Derek knocked lightly on the door as they pushed the door open a bit.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We good?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charli nodded, fresh (happy, happy) tears brimming in her eyes. Derek and Stiles made quick work to wash their hands before settling in two of the chairs by Charli’s bed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles made grabby hands, “Gimme </span>
  <em>
    <span>gimme</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” She tucked the baby against her body, looking down at him. She whispered, “Hi baby boy, look at you. Happy birthday! You made us wait so long.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Derek was busy having a staring contest with the baby, whose eyes were seemingly focused on the blob of green that was Derek. Stiles slid her arms slowly towards Derek, transferring the bundle into Derek’s arms.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Derek looked down at the baby, “Hey buddy…” Little fingers wrapped around his pinky, “Look at that grip. So strong.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles turned to Charli, keeping her voice low, “Have you two decided on a name yet?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charli just hummed a little, grinning at Stiles. “We have actually.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a pregnant (hah) pause and both Stiles and Derek looked up Charlie. “Well?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charli wiped away the tears that were at the edge of her eyes, clearing her throat. “Derek.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Derek looked up at her, “Yeah?” While Stiles gasped, tears edging her eyes too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charli rolled her eyes. “His name is Derek. Derek Dominick.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Derek’s eyes got wide and then he looked down at the bundle in his arms, who was still clutching his finger. Stiles was next to Derek, sniffling into a pile of Kleenex. “That… beautiful…” Stiles leaned into Derek, wrapping her arms around him under his arms, delicately as to not disturb </span>
  <em>
    <span>either</span>
  </em>
  <span> Derek.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Derek looked up at Charli, "Me?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"...duh. Derek. You… you saved me when the darkness was going to take Freddy and I away. You and Stiles. You gave me a new chance at life when I didn't think I was worthy."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Derek carefully got up, Stiles untangling her arms. He leaned over Charli, kissing her temple, tears falling down his cheeks. He settled the new baby back in her arms. "Love you Chacha. Pops is gonna cry too, ya know."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Charli pulled him against her for a quick hug. "Eddie and Jay are gonna be whiny little shits too.</span>
  <em>
    <span> Ugh</span>
  </em>
  <span>."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck - what are you </span>
  <em>
    <span>making</span>
  </em>
  <span>?” Derek pulled his shirt up over his nose as he walked into the kitchen.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Stiles turned to him, knife in hand, “French onion soup. I need a lot of onions.” Her eyes were rimmed red and tears were collecting in the corners of her eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you making enough for an army?” Derek’s eyes started to sting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It was your brother’s birthday brunch request.” Stiles attempted to rub her eye against the shoulder of her shirt. “Also. I need to tell your brother that I hate him.”</span>
</p>
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